What is Your Man Really Doing in the Potty?

I'm just dying to know....

Many women have told me how their husband/significant other takes 30+ minutes to go to the bathroom in the morning AND they take the newspaper in with them to read. What happens when that family has decided to go "paperless" and order the paper online, such as the WSJ.com? Do they take the laptop in with them?

And are they staying on the newspaper page or are they secretly blog surfing? Do me a favor, if you are sitting on the pot right now and are reading this, please comment on this article right away! Too embarrassing? I get it. But I still want you to comment, just sign in as 'anonymous'.

And then I digress. What if somehow I discover through my Google analytics report that most of my subscribers and followers are men sitting on the potty ignoring the daily news to read my latest post? Do I alter my content to appease them? Do they like the funny posts to make them laugh and maybe "go" quicker at the potty? (If anything, I think they want to prolong this morning ritual, so maybe I need to write longer, thought-provoking stories).

Maybe I would need to add more titillating posts and by that I mean more tits. Example:

I'm afraid this is just going to be one of life's mysteries. Like why men take so long to go the bathroom in the morning in the first place.

Proud Mom as Oldest Son Starts His Career

Andy's girlfriend took these pictures of him as he was getting ready for his first day of work at Ernst and Young, much to his dismay. He'd probably die if he know that I posted them on my website. I cannot help it. I am so very proud of him and his accomplishments. I cried with joy for about 30 minutes when I saw them. I cannot believe that he is all grown up, has left my nest and is ready to be out in the working world.

I especially like that he is standing so tall next to the tall buttes in the Ansel Adams print.

Good luck, Andy. May you be successful in all your adventures ahead of you.

Feeling Safe in America

Without sounding too "preachy" or political, I just want to say a little prayer for our nation and the victims who were killed on this day seven years ago. I have no idea what has kept our nation safe from attacks from our nation's enemies; I am just thankful that someone has taken on this responsibility, and seemingly, know what they are doing. Maybe it's just luck, or maybe the policies and procedures that have been put in place are working. Maybe our President and Homeland Security have done a great job and we do not even know it. I just know that my family and me do not feel threatened and that is a wonderful feeling.

This is why I am not quick to say that war is a smart or dumb thing for our nation to engage in and whether or not we need extra layers of protection which may invade on our privacy. I do not want that responsibility of being wrong and risk the chance of many people being hurt or killed as a result of my decisions. Instead, I ask the politicians we elect to become well-versed and studied on this topic and to try not to think in terms of partisan politics. Many people in your constituency are like me and don't have the time or the resources to make an educated opinion on what is right or wrong in keeping our nation safe from attack.

Today is a day of reflection and prayers and hope for our collection futures and thank those men and women who carry this heavy burden in keeping America safe from harm.